“Wedding season is upon us” is a phrase I don’t really find applicable in Egypt. It’s wedding season all year round and it’s a non-stop list of events, outings and celebrations. Although it makes me extremely happy when people find their significant other and come together in holy matrimony, being a bridesmaid all year long can get hectic and costly. Double, triple underline on costly because I don’t even know what a salary means anymore.
I’ve been a bridesmaid at least five different times this year and I’m honestly just worn out. From stressing about traveling and accommodation, losing weight, buying dresses, showing up to the countless events, hiring makeup artists, buying gifts and providing emotional support, it’s starting to turn into a part-time job.
I can’t really put my finger on when this trend started becoming so explosive in Egypt but it has become another level of extra. I’ve spent close to 50,000 LE this year on the aforementioned activities. Being a bridesmaid has no longer become a fun past time where you throw a bachelorette party and play raunchy games and get in a dress that looks exactly the same as 10 other girls as you happy-cry for your friend walking down the aisle. It’s becoming a financial burden that girls (and their families who are paying for it) honestly just shouldn’t have to endure.
In Egypt, there are several steps that are taken before it’s finally your wedding day. First comes the erayet el fat7a, with a follow-up outing to celebrate. So you dress up, go out, spend a ridiculous amount of money at an overly priced venue and go home. Next comes the engagement party, which may not necessarily even be taking place in the capital. Younger couples have chosen to throw them in Sahel, Gouna and other similar cities. This again requires renting a house, buying a dress and taking time off of work. Even if it does take place in Cairo, the above still applies.
After the engagement party, comes the bachelorette and here we go again, mo money mo problems. It has become a trend in recent years to throw a bachelorette abroad because the variety of available and beautiful cities we have just don’t make the cut anymore, #Mykonos #Beirut #Bali #Dubai and the list goes on. So here’s what you need to factor in, yet again.
Travel, accommodation, an insane amount of pocket money, going shopping for the outfits you’re going to be wearing on the trip and so on. When the bachelorette has finally come to an end and you can start to breathe again, the anxiety of having to be in shape and designing a dress comes next. The bride picks the color of the dress and it’s up to you to go buy the material, see a designer, attend countless fittings and finally getting your dress, that you still most probably dislike anyway. It’s not over yet. Next comes the katb ketab, which is traditionally held at a mosque, at home or on the day of the wedding. And you’ll need to prepare another outfit for that. This is either followed up by yet another outing or if you’re lucky enough you can just go home, kick your heels off and watch TV.
Okay, now the wedding is finally approaching and you’re about to lose your shit because you’ve already done so much. You need to get your dress ready, hire a makeup artist, get your hair done, reserve a room at the hotel and then stand around and take pictures whilst holding little matching bouquets with your other minion friends. Oh, and it’s your absolute duty to be at the bride’s every beck and call and how dare you disappear off of the dance floor for a mere moment to go get a drink of water. You’ll come back to an evil glare demanding an explanation of where you’ve been for the past 2.5 minutes.
Don’t get me wrong, I love weddings, I love seeing people happy and nothing brings me greater joy than seeing my friends glowing and looking beautiful. But it’s all becoming a little too much. Just because you’re getting married, doesn’t mean that 10 other girls need to go through months and months of planning, spending money, going shopping and becoming absolutely emotionally and physically drained. Cut the crap, focus on being in love and take marriage back to its actual pure and innocent roots of simplicity, love and partnership. The extravagant showing off and jet-set life ways, can honest to God just take a back seat and chill.
Main image from Weddings in Houston.
