In life, I believe that for the good moments to actually mean something, one has to go through the dark side of life. I believe in balance. For example, one has to take some time off to practice self-care, have fun and do things for themselves but there also has to be a time where they take on responsibilities, hustle and work hard. It’s a full circle and one completes the other. When the scale tips to one side, that often indicates a problem.
My problem is that sometimes people get too comfortable living their lives on just one side of these two extremes. I’ve personally witnessed a number of people living on both ends of the scale. Those who only live for the fun parts of life like the parties and the outings, usually giving excuses for anything that has to do with work or commitment. These people are often those who want things to come easy. They live off of other people’s money (usually their parents) and think that dodging responsibilities is all that life has to offer. Any ounce of responsibility thrown at them will end up in them getting angry and feeling suffocated.
On the other hand, you will find those who do nothing but work, work, work. They miss out on family gatherings, they cancel plans with their friends, they don’t celebrate important dates with their significant other because they were too busy with a client or whatever. Usually, they use excuses to dodge anything that isn’t work-related or financially beneficial. They think of everything in terms of money, as if money is all that life has to offer.
For me, both of these personalities, and any personality that lives this way, are all exactly the same. They live only for themselves, not putting into consideration that they hurt the people that care about them, and when you try to address the situation they give out the ‘this is the way I am and how you should accept me’ excuse. They’re not willing to change for the better, not knowing, that a balance exists, or to put it more clearly, not willing to find that balance in the first place.
In all honesty, if someone is not willing to change their ways, that is fine, it’s their right, but then they shouldn’t let people into their lives and make them depend on them, only to let them down.
Forgive me if i’m coming off as a bit judgmental, but I would love for this article to be a reminder or a sign for those who get too comfortable with where they are in life. I understand that when we feel good, we fear change and are content to stay were we are. That ‘feel good’ place at work or in parties, it doesn’t matter. It can undermine our motivation to explore or improve because we just don’t want to hit that inevitable large bump in the roadway that’ll shake us up. But I believe we learn and develop the most from adversity and getting out of our comfort zones.
Learn to move forward by accepting change and being vulnerable. Know that life is not only meant to be lived for yourself and your own comfort. Look around you and know that there are people who genuinely care about you. Those are the people who deserve your time, be willing to change yourself for them, as long as the change brings on positive outcomes.
